I’ve been watching a lot of non-Avengers 1960s spy-fi as part of an ongoing project I’m working on, and then in a conversation with a friend about The Avengers, this little moment came up. This gave me the idea to rank the spy-bros on whether they would run their umbrella along a corrugated elevator wall on a scale of 0 (never in a million years) to 5 (Steed in a corrugated elevator with an umbrella). Here goes.
James Bond (Bond movies and books) – 0. James Bond is a sentient cabbage with an itchy trigger finger and no sense of humor. Totally utilitarian attitude towards things like umbrellas and elevators.
John Drake (Danger Man) – 1. This guy is a nuclear pile of anger stuffed into a three-piece suit, but he might do it if it were necessary to catch a bad guy. Defo wouldn’t do it for fun. Drake doesn’t know what fun is.
Illya Kuryakin (MFU) – 1. Lacks imagination and a sense of humor, but would do it to catch a bad guy. He’s also too busy looking cool, and doing stimmy things in elevators isn’t cool.
Simon Templar (The Saint) – 3. Extreme outside chance that he would do it for fun. More likely to do it if it helped him catch the baddie. Or to impress a woman. He’s flexible that way.
Napoleon Solo (MFU) – 4. Might actually do it for fun. Or to annoy someone, especially Illya. Or to catch a bad guy. Solo isn’t the best human being out there, but at least he does have a sense of humor.
John Steed (The Avengers) 5 – Would do this every time. Doesn’t need a reason. Has a sense of humor and a magnificent sense of the absurd. It’s just fun and stimmy, and he doesn’t care what anyone else thinks.